Timothy Minchinothy

So, last week, I went to a concert... a Tim Minchin concert! If you haven't heard of him, well... you have some great songs to catch up on! One such song is below, and yes, that was part of his concert.

Most of his songs were recent ones, where he talks a lot about how he moved from LA to Aussie...and yes, he was very self-deprecating about the fact that he was rich enough to do that. And so we get a range of songs from maudlin to his more jocular efforts, including a rather great piece about "CHEESE!" As he put it, there was Old Songs, New Songs, Fuck You Songs.

This concert was called "Back" as he was Back, back in Aussie, back to touring, even more poignant after the recent years. I have no idea where he's going, I only happen to spot this concert was even happening when looking at the ticketing website, but I'm glad I went. So check out, and see if he's coming Back near you!

And bonus fact: He has a Glossary!!!

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Eff Nien

This time it's about family! Also, physics takes a holiday!

When you look at Vin Diesel you think "he's clearly related to John Cena", and so this movie. It's brother versus brother as they hunt down another mcguffin that does a thing that isn't possible, but we'll buy into it because it's fun. There are lots of car stunts, although there could be more. There are also plenty of people, and they all come together for the big set piece, and then there's the final scene where we even see...

First of all, I do want to point out that this is a fun dumb movie. I'm about to critique points, but I still enjoyed watching it.

Point one: there are a lot of main cast to get through. As these films have expanded and taken on more characters, and not killed them off (and killed some of them off, but it didn't stick), there are a lot of characters to cameo. And so we get a lot of quick random scenes of "hey, it's that person" as the plot tries to shoehorn them in, some more successful than others. Which means a lot more talking sequences, which is of course what brings people to these movies.

Another point is about physics. And metaphysics. They have the comedy black duo point out how lucky they are to get away with what they do, but they don't really do anything with that. Set up the lampshade, but don't follow through. And even have the gall to have the line "trust the physics" at one point! There is nothing in this movie that obeys the laws of physics! Ropes, magnets, dna, all sorts of things just do whatever the plot wants, not what any principles of reality have to do with it.

Still, the main thing is heart, and this movie has tons of that. So enjoy!

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Triple Conjuration

Don't call it the third one, it doesn't have a number, it just has a subtitle.

After an exorcism, the demon jumps from the kid to the adult, but people don't realise this immediately. Slowly everyone does come to realise something weird is going on, and Ed and Lorraine Warren need to dig in what is going on, who is actually causing it, and how to stop them.

Because it really is satanism and such and there really is a devil and yadda yadda yadda... No there isn't! We get the actual tapes played, but the kid is just doing a voice. And you know what? In these sorts of possessions, in the movies, we always see the body twisting and contorting... if the people actually did do that, do you know what that would do to their ligaments and bones? Ow! Snapping!

Okay, aside from all that, how is it? As ever, Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga have an absolutely bloody fantastic chemistry! Put those two together in anything, and I will believe they are a couple. And hey, John Noble! Ever since Fringe, I'm seeing him in so many roles. He must have had a great career before then, but I am completely oblivious.

The story itself is rather blah. Yes, we've seen many possessed movies before, and them paying homage to The Exorcist at the beginning doesn't excuse them for doing it here. The crew was apparently tired of haunted house cases, so fine, but this isn't really stretching the format.

I'm still sure there will be more Conjurings to come... and I'm just as sure I will watch them as soon as they come out...

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Sperel

It's a torture porn film, it must be Saw...

Many years after the events of Saw, someone decides to take a stand against the police and kill off officers that are corrupt. (Oooh, timely commentary!) Can the One Good Officer find out the person who is behind all this?

There is political commentary here in the corrupt cops, but there isn't really anything done about that given the current social atmosphere. More like "this is what the movie was always about and then society turned against the police."

The bigger problem with this movie is... why is this Saw? Not just the social commentary angle, but this could easily have been any "the corrupt police are being taken out" and there was no real need to set it in the larger universe at all. Aside from a few references, it's completely irrelevant.

And then there is Chris Rock, who is either doing a comedy bit, or trying to do a serious bit. His face is so often "I can't believe this" that I can't take many of his scenes seriously. And Samuel L Jackson is wasted, but then this movie shouldn't have happened this way, so not surprising his role doesn't really work either.

But as ever, this film has traps, and that is what is important. Although watching this, I am left wondering... how the hell did a) the killer get the traps into position and b) custom make some of this? Just go into business as an engineer, make lots of money!

Overall, it was just kinda meh. The graphic horror was pretty graphic, in keeping with the series, but the story is largely generic and not really enthralling.

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A Quieter Location

Eh, what the heck, let's go to the cinema! The sequel is out, so time to partake.

Aside from a brief moment at the beginning to show how this all started, and to introduce another character we'll meet later, we start basically from where the previous movie ended. The family (...I cannot recall their last name... or even their first names, mostly, to be honest. One downside of people not talking is that they don't say names often for me to remember) have to move on to a new secure location. After bumping into the character introduced in the opening bit, they find a clue that there might be more people, and which also, co-incidentally, ties into how the creatures can be defeated. Convenient! After that... it's a matter of split up people so we have different threads to follow until the end.

Once again, sound plays an important role with this movie. Which again makes me very aware of me eating popcorn during the movie, munch, munch, munch... This also (again I'm sure) makes me wonder about films in which there are no dialogue. Not silent movies, but movies that just don't have any dialogue in them.

But back to this movie, this is very much a sequel, in that it does follow directly on from the previous movie and continues with the plot threads of that. Then the point of the movie becomes focused on the kids, and how do they survive and pick up the mantle with the adults aren't around/really able to do so. Fortunately, the kids aren't terrible, so I didn't mind following them!

After a slower Act 1 and 2, Act 3 is a lot of action, in that I keep forgetting all the beats that are in there. Which makes it a somewhat uneven movie, but at least I'm still remembering it at all!

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Wroth of Mon

Jason Statham? Guy Ritchie? Sure, I'm in!

A crew hits a security truck carrying cash. Completely incidentally a hard guy joins the security team not long after and is looking at people suspiciously. As you might guess, something went wrong and now someone has to pay. So get ready for a lot of violence and people looking tough.

As far as these movies go, this felt rather middle of the road for Ritchie. Considering he recently did The Gentlemen, this came across as Ritchie on auto-pilot. Sure, it's still got the action you want, but there isn't really heart to it, just rather rote of people playing parts.

Turns out, this is a remake of a French film, and I have to admit I kinda want to watch that now, although I can't see it anywhere.

If you are looking for a two hour action piece, give this a go, but it's not a top Ritchie product.

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MORAL WOMBAT!!!

Wow, this movie got a drubbing from various places, so I guess I'm not gonna like this...

In Samurai Times (which are a distinct time period in history now, given the number of movies set there), who-would-be-Sub-Zero attacks the family of who-would-be-Scorpion. Only a baby survives. Cut to modern day, and fighters are being gathered because it's time for the tenth competition between Earthrealm and Outworld. As it happens, the baby's descent is one of the fighters so that links everything together. However, while they are all training, Outworld decides "sod the rules, let's cheat" (which they've been doing already), so let's launch into Mortal Kombat!!

You know what... I like this movie! The fight scenes are great. The narrative connective tissue works find to get you from place to place and keep things clear. This isn't a cinematic masterpiece, but considering I'm watching a movie based on a video game, yeah, this is good!

I also liked the 1995 movie, although that was leaning far more into the silliness than this movie. The sequel can jump in the trash though.

I have no doubt the series will jump on sequels given half a chance, but as much as I liked this, I doubt this will get there. (Happy to be wrong.)

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