Monday, 10 August 2009

Yo Joe!

So, I have now seen the latest advertisement for Hasbro toys. Eh, I'm not impressed. Have to say that I really think anything's been added to the oeuvre of "high-tech military outfit fighting another high-tech military outfit... based on toys... by Hasbro". I think the fields already saturated by now.

And what does it teach us about life? Firstly, don't put the guy in charge of the mission where he has to kill his love, 'cos that's going to ruin the mission. Secondly, you can indeed bug women enough to make them like you. Not to mention, thirdly, white guys are better than Asian guys. Oh, and fourthly, it's okay for lots of destruction as long as the people who suffer are French. (Fifthly, it is possible to have a base in the sand without any hint of sand in the base itself.) [Sixthly, people can have expository flashbacks at the drop of a hat.]

I mean, really, lots and lots of things blowing up, cars flipping over, etc. Now, because this is for the kiddies, there is no blood, dismembered limbs, people spread thinly on the road, etc. The good guys trying to beat the bad guys created more death and destruction than the bad guys do!

At least we have Christopher Eccleston, putting on a really broad Scottish accent. And Jonathan Pryce! And cameos by Arnold Vosloo and Kevin J. O'Connor. And Sienna Miller and Rachel Nichols have a cat-fight (although Karolina Kurkova is prettier). On the other hand, there is a Wayans brother involved...

I'm sure people are clambering for a sequel, although I'm not sure the audience is. I think this movie has pretty much run its course. So... how long until the S.H.I.E.L.D. movie?


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