Sunday 24 June 2012

Snake-Fish!

Rolling the random animal dice we get... a snake crossed with a fish! 'Cos that will happen!

So, I knew I was in for crap when I started, this is a made movie for Syfy, which has a reputation to live down to. And in the opening credits, we get the first name: Michael Madsen. Really? I sincerely hope he was in it for the money. And then the next name is... Rachel Hunter. ...wha? Our Rachel Hunter? Yes, it turns out the New Zealand girl is in the movie. Speaking of doing this for the money...

The basic premise is that people, especially young women who are not at all there for the sexual exploitation of their bodies... no wait, that's exactly why they are there, have no reason to wander around the jungle until they are killed by extremely bad CGI. Oddly, the script attempts some plots, but nothing makes any sense, and everything is soon about the bad CGI snake/fish thing.

Oh, and a note, throwing a lampshade on it doesn't let you get away with it. Rachel, of all people, gets the line "A piranhaconda?" Every though the next line is "I can't believe you said that." doesn't make it any better! Neither does having some guy say "I'm going to wear a mask." and having someone else say "I can't believe he's wearing a mask." make it a believable excuse for the mask to hide the stuntman.

Just because you can make a movie, doesn't mean you should. Case in point...

[END]

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