Monday, 28 April 2014

A Dangnabbit Man

Take an idea by Guy Ritchie, set it in America, make it about the Chinese and Russian mafias, then add in Steven Seagal with a lot of one-on-one fast paced martial action sequences... and blam, this movie!

Shane is thrown in jail for a crime he didn't commit, and by the time he gets released under Project Innocence, his life has basically gone. So, while trying to get drunk, he sees the Chinese killing a cop. And saved a Russian mobster's kid who just happened to be there. And saves the kidnapped girl. And sets off the Chinese vs everyone war that occupies the rest of this movie. There's running around, and a lot of set pieces of people invading places and getting in gun fights and Shane throwing people around without getting a scratch (Seriously, I don't think anyone lays a finger on Steven in all the fights he is in). Finally the not so bad guys win, so... yay?

Steven Seagal isn't really trying in this movie, in fact he barely looks interested (although he doesn't look like he skipped any meals recently). The Colonel and Chen are the more interesting characters, and the whole movie could have been about them interacting with each other (indeed it nearly is, and their scenes could be in an entirely separate movie to the one featuring Seagal). Far too many minor characters and lots of drab locations meant I often lost track... but didn't really care. It's not like the plot mattered. Oh, and aside from the main female lead, the rest of the woman are basically treated as meat... classy.

This is a stupid dumb movie. An entertaining stupid dumb movie... but a stupid dumb movie nonetheless.


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