Sunday, 5 June 2011

The Asylum's Schlock Doh'lmes!

Just so you have some inkling of what I subjected myself to:

Now you too will be asking yourself "Did I just see that?"

With the good comes the bad. And this isn't the good. The plot derails quickly, and then quickly becomes absurd. The writer has decided to bring in Sherlock's family, but... why? In fact, you'll be asking yourself at lot that, especially nearer the end. Why? What possible reason is there for that? And it hints at a lot more history, which is really important and vital to understanding the plot, but it's never explained.

Instead, there are more interesting sequences to have. Such as five minutes of Watson climbing down a cliff then back up again, with absolutely nothing of consequence. Actually, worse that nothing, something seems to happen, but is studiously never mentioned again! And be careful on your morning constitutional not to wander into the thick lush choked jungle that is just outside 221B Baker Street. The hells? Then there are binoculars with inbuilt plot devicium that enable them to see key moments as if they were a camera positioned in the scene!

Presuming you can see anything. Often the camera has the 'brown' lens on, rendering everything in colours of rust, beige and mud. To compare to other sequences in which other colours are allowed. It's rather disconcerting.

Let's talk CGI. The fire effects are, frankly, rubbish. It's clear the effect was layered on the image afterwards. And as for the creature effects... actually, they are surprisingly good. Comparable to The Mill and the like. Fine, the sight of a dinosaur in Victorian London does take you out of the picture, but Primeval are about to do that themselves, so I can't complain about it too much. However, the interaction is more than dodgy. If you must have a room of CGI creatures, tell the actors were to look or they will think the room is full of stuff to look at rather than, as the audience sees, extremely empty.

However, this is a Sherlock Holmes movie (so it claims), so let's talk characters. Ben Syder is Holmes (in his action persona) and Gareth David-Lloyd is Watson (whom seems to be the hero of the movie at times). And... to be honest, they have some great character moments between them. Unfortunately hampered by having to deal with the plot, but they and the music are good points about this movie. William Huw as Lestrade is a complete waste of inclusion (as in Lestrade is a waste putting him in, not Huw). And as Dominic Keating as... well, if he was any more arch, he'd have fornication. Oi...

As this was Victorian horrendous (as opposed to, say, horror) I did remember War of the Worlds. And at least this isn't that.

There are some good moments in this, but few and far between.



evildicemonkey said...

Does he perform any deduction?

Jamas Enright said...

There's a big deduction scene at the beginning as the writer goes "Hey, it's Sherlock Holmes, and he detects things Watson doesn't!". Then one bit about midway through the movie... otherwise, nada.