Thursday, 12 July 2012

Conquest of the Apes

Yes, we all knew the son would come back, and he did in this movie. Completely going against ape history (wasn't it supposed to be some ape beginning with R who first said 'no'?), and against evolution too. Twenty years may have passed, but there's no way you are going to get gorillas, chimpanzees and orangutans to look like... well... people in jumpsuits and face masks. You need far longer than that. (Actually longer than the 2000 years the first movie had too, come to that.)

Anyway, Caeser wanders around, gets caught up with other apes, and then in the last half hour of the movie turns apes into the masters of everything. This movie is just plain boring. Nothing happens for a long time... then more nothing happens, then something actually happens, only I gave up caring by that point.

Roddy McDowell is back, yay, but goes over the top as only Roddy McDowell can. Ricardo Montalban isn't in it enough, as expected. Hari Rhodes gives a great performance. And... others are in it, but I can't be bothered working out who any of them are.

We've come full circle, that's it, right, no more movies needed?

Still, at least we know what this movie was remade as:


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