Sunday, 9 March 2014

'Ave a lanche Sharks!

I was wondering what I was going to talk about... then I saw this was available. Woo!

Up on a mountain, there are people pulling sick skiing moves. Woo! Look at the people shredding the snow and freewheeling the boards and... other terms, I have no idea. Oh, and sharks are around. Before you ask 'how can they move through snow?', don't worry, they are mystical sharks, courtesy of native Americans, so everything is fine. People slowly go missing (the main couple spend a lot of time looking for two people... and I'm not sure we ever met the people who are missing, so cared not even in the slightest), and no-one believes sharks are about, until they see them. And, of course, by then, it's too late. Chomp! Fortunately, due to complete chance, everyone (ie three remaining cast members) live! Unless others survive. Meh.

I will admit the sharks look decent. They are a CGI and composited as fuck into the movie, but what we see is well detailed. The blood effects are... bad. The shooting is standard 'put on bullet sparks afterwards' affair. And all I will say about the acting is that they showed off the bodies of very pretty women, who were clearly hired to have bodies to show off.

With the way this is all going, how long until "Comic Sharks - this time for go for the issue without the splash page!" ?


No comments: