Better Ape

Hey, it's that monkey movie!

Robert has a not terrible life (considering), but has a star in his eye. With a random bit of cheekiness, he joins Take That, but is repressed by his bandmates... and needs to break free. Badly, after a terrible whirlwind romance, he does, he's on top, he's... hating every moment of it.

As much as people love this, this does feel like a standard biopic movie. Not great childhood, break out fame, drugs, so many drugs, and a big concert.

Except he's a monkey. That does take a moment to vibe with, but it works fine, and fits really well. I will agree that we need more monkey movies.

Oh, and Steve Pemberton is in this, with some really bad wigs. Odd after seeing him in Taskmaster.

So I've seen it, but... meh, it was fine, not amazing.

If you want a better take on it all:

Are Music Biopics Good Now?

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Virtuscosity

Since I mentioned it...

In the far future of 1999, virtual reality is so far advanced people are being trained to fight crime... where people are criminals who are testing the system. One such is ex-cop Parker Barnes, who went away for killing the man who killed his family. However, to provide a good test, he is up against Sid 6.7, who is every bad guy combined, including the killer, who of course is dominant. Due to horniness, Sid escapes into the real world, and only Parker can track him down, despite being continually set up as the bad guy. But, hey, at least guns are free and plenty.

It's Denzel Washington being Denzel Washington, so very watchable (and he gets to beat up a nazi!). Russel Crowe is eating all the scenery (literally in one scene), and gloriously hamming it up. There's also a collection of other famous faces, and a very young Kelly Cuoco!

This is pure cheese, but it isn't really trying for anything else. Everyone just looks to be enjoying themselves, although no-one as much as Russell Crowe.

Watch for a laugh, not for deep philosophy.

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Tron Tares

Subtlety? What's that then?

Dillinger creates a monster, but perhaps the monster is more than the creator? Ares is that Frankenstein's monster, and when ordered to kill Dillinger's competitor, he decides that after having stalked her, she is the one who must live. And so we get real people in the digital world, and digital people in the real world (physics? what's that then?). And for creatures that can only survive 29 minutes in the real world, damn that is a long ass 29 minutes for us to suffer through.

Did this need to be a Tron movie? Did this need to be any movie? It does inherit some backstory and world setting it can otherwise skip over, but it also skips over how one goes about creating digital things in the real world, so whatever. And hey, I've seen Virtuosity!

There are some worthy people in here, but everyone gets overshadowed by Jared Leto, for whom this feels like a vanity project. And the CGI is... fine. But it all makes me wonder how it is supposed to work in the real world.

Well, now we wait for the inevitable sequel.

At least the sound track was great!

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Initialism D

Read the manga (well, some of), watched the anime (well, some of), so why not watch the movie (all of)?

Takumi drives fast, like real fast. And he delivers tofu. So when some racers see him racing, they go "hey, we want tofu!" ... I mean "we want to race him" and so the first act of the movie is just getting him to race point. The second act is getting him to get excited about racing. And the third act is to get him racing while thinking about his girlfriend. (Yes, they keep Natsuki having "that" relationship, although I have no idea if the manga/anime gives it up as she does here.)

It's very compressed, in that in the manga/anime several chapters/episodes can be one race alone, but here we have several. It's not bad in that, but it does feel very "and now they suddenly decide to do the next bit" as opposed to moving the story along more organically.

There are definite movie tricks, where the movie will freeze on a particular frame. That is probably a nod to various manga panels, but it really just feels like the movie forgot to actually move. There is a few other stylistic shots, but the driving is well shot, so we do feel like there is indeed a race. I'm not sure where they filmed it, but I'm sure it was often loud and noisy night shoots.

I am nearly tempted to get the full anime and watch that, as I know there is a lot more that takes place after this, but I doubt I'll around to that any time soon...

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Baff Led

He was in one major TV series, can Leonard Nimoy make it two?

Tom Kovack gets a new skill in the way of psychic visions, which is rather impractical when driving in a car race. Michele Brent takes his visions as the truth, and together they head to sunny ole England to find... some supernatural vagueness that causes some kind of problems I guess that are problems? But at least Tom can see random images to solve the case!

This is a TV movie that is basically a pilot... that quite obviously was never going to go anywhere as soon as you see it. The acting is terrible and the effects are worse. At least there is Christopher Benjamin.

The most baffling part of all is what they thought the poster was all about:

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Bootopia too

It's that movie where the bad fox because a good fox... no, the other one.

Judy and... fox... (already forgot his name) are trying really hard, and go from screwing up a case to getting framed as the bad guys in another crime, involving a snake, because reptiles are now a thing this movie. They chase the plot around for a while, giving only a nodding pretense towards a character arc, and then get to the big set piece at the end of the movie.

What a pointless movie. Now, there is no doubt many people who love this, and it's a big thing for the furries and the scalies and... but for me, this is a big nothing burger. Nothing of note happens, the jokes are are flat, and there's no tension anywhere.

The voices are all fine, although Ke Huy Quan doesn't get that much to do given that he is now a thing. I'm sure there are many cameos of note, but aside from Danny Trejo, I didn't hear anyone.

There is likely going to be a third movie, and I'll get around to watching it... with the same enthusiasm as I saw this.

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Benny Hilly Coppy 2

Hey, I forgot I was watching these. Let's get number 2 done!

Bogomil is investigating a case, but gets shot at. This bring Foley back to Beverly Hills to team up once again with Taggart and Rosewood. Foley once again bluffs his way into a house, into various clubs, and through most of the movie. Taggart and Rosewood tag along, and happen to be there when big events happen, until they all accidentally manage to solve the crime no-one wanted them on.

Rosewood... is a terrible cop. Like, none of them are good, Foley breaks the law all the time, Taggart doesn't give a damn, but Rosewood has a gun collection most 2nd Amendment freaks would be proud of, and his incompetence actively allows criminals to get away. Now this is part comedy, but when you are siding with the hard-ass chief, you know you screwed the character up.

We get a lot of returning cast (I assume, I can't remember who was in the first one), although we do also get "the chief turned over a lot of the department" to explain why, other than the main three, none of the other police officers we might know of are around. And there are some notable names joining them, with Jürgen Prochnow being menacing, Dean Stockwell badly sporting a mustache, Gilbert Godfried cameoing, and Brigitte Nielsen not singing.

This is a very light movie, with japes and goofs galore and no-one taking anything seriously, including the bad guys. As a sequel, this doesn't feel like it needed to be made beyond "hey, those guys had fun making the first one, let's get them back together!"

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