Violence Night

Just before the event hits, let's see the latest comedy action flick around Cinta Klaus.

Santa is out delivering presents, but is caught when a bunch of thugs decide to invade a rich people's mansion and he has to pare down his naughty list.

Which makes it sound a lot more basic, but from the trailer I was expecting more that Santa was out and about and gets called in by the girl believing in him, but nope, he just happens to be there. And he's saving rich people, which are the ones with the large houses and money that attract thugs but have lots of room for running around beating them up. I guess the poor people can save themselves? Well, actually, they would never be attacked in the first place, so yay for them I guess?

Does this sound a little Die Hard? Well, yeah, and they even call out that movie in this, but that doesn't draw away from... it's a lot of fun. Santa gets his roots on and the movie treats him as an actual person with Christmas magic giving help in some things. Which means that David Harbour gets to have fun, and I do wonder how often he had flashbacks back to being the Red Guardian.

The rest of the cast were good, with Beverly D'Angelo having the best time not giving a shit. But I can't quite buy John Leguizamo as a master fightersman.

So yeah, some fun for seeing in some xmastide, but it's not going to be more.

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Convergance

I complained about Marvel, so I should complain about DC. The basic premise of Convergence is "What if we did a low rent Crisis at home?"

Brainiac evolves and gets Telos to gather Gothams and Metropolises from across the different timelines, and then the heroes are forced to fight each other. In the mean time, a group of hero variants that no-one cares about deals with Telos and another chap whose name I can't recall but turns out to be another villain for them to fight.

As you might be tell, I wasn't too impressed with it. It was just an excuse to bring back previous continuities of heroes that various writers liked and play with them a bit. Aside from the main story line, all the tie ins were two parters, which were usually Part One: We've been here a year, and Part Two: We fight someone else. (Somehow, for the year, all the heroes had their powers removed, unless they didn't.)

At least with Crisis, they change the way the universe goes, resetting the continuity and what not. But with this, it is just mashing things together, and since none of the universes really are impacted in any significant way, it doesn't matter in the slightest who wins and who loses. Let alone I couldn't remember half of them, and the other half weren't distinctive, that revisiting them didn't feel special.

This was aggressively advertised in comics leading up to it.. and during it, it aggressively advertised the next thing. So it was just a brief stop on some larger map for selling comics, and doesn't matter if you pay attention to it or not.

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Disney pinned

This is part rant/part technical support. [UPDATE: NOPE, STILL NOT WORKING!!!]

I subscribe to DisneyPlus. Yep, I give the Big Mouse money. Shocking, I know. All of us are already under its sway it'll be quicker to list people who aren't either supporting or employed by them. But I get DisneyPlus, and watch all them episodes. (And because I'm me, yes at two-speed.)

But recently I hit a problem. Latest episodes of Willow and National Treasure would not play. Like I get the Disney Plus logo but... nothing. Episode did nothing. And yet, I could watch other things, like the X-Men animated series, so it's not a blanket thing.

And, more oddly, the episodes do play in the separate app. I watch in Chrome, mainly 'cos I didn't think of the app, but then I wouldn't be able to change speed (enable that function, people!).

I did eventually work out how to get it to work. I won't say I solved it, because this shouldn't be a thing, and yet...

Because DisneyPlus incorporates Starz, it had adult material, so you can a) set the level of material you can see, and b) put on parental controls, which is basically a four digit pin, to stop the kiddies viewing it. I recently had a pin, but disabled it because... it's just me here, why should I need a pin and have to enter in whenever I go there. The hell? No, I'm lazy! Removed!

...as you can probably guess, when I reinstated the pin, I could watch the episodes! Somehow, DisneyPlus thought I shouldn't be watching the episodes or something unless I could prove I could enter a four digit number???

So yes, I can now watch the episodes at whatever speed I want, but I'm back to being annoyed by the pin. Clearly this is the worst problem anyone has ever faced!

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Secret Dumpire

Secret Empire was a big Marvel comic project, where Steve Rogers/Captain America became an agent of Hydra due to a sentient cosmic cube named Kobik (don't ask: COMICS!) being swayed by the Red Skull's ideas and changing the past of Steve to always being Hydra.

This is a Big Idea(tm), where you go "what if the big good guy was in fact one of the big bad guys?" But the big problem with this idea is... everyone knows what's going on. Every other hero knows that Kobik changed Steve and he is now Stevil (this is an in-canon name for him). There are a few heroes that side with Stevil (either mercenaries, or a small handful of otherwise corrupted heroes), but it is essentially Stevil versus everyone else.

(I'm going to ignore the fact that changing the past would have changed everyone's interactions with Steve, so they wouldn't know that Kobik due it, but, again, COMICS!)

What would have been more interesting is that if Kobik changed other heroes to also be on the side of Hydra. Make it an actual battle where several heroes do believe in the ideals of Hydra that Stevil espouses, so there is an actual discussion of ideas.

But that way lies the concept of Civil War (of which there are two). Only this one would have a better reason for happening and a clearer view of which side is actually right (and there actually being a right side). BOOM! Civil War roasted!

As it stands: One person, who is essentially an obvious villain, versus all the heroes. It wasn't really going to be that exciting to play out, was it?

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Science Versus

Urban Fantasy is becoming a bigger genre at the moment, with the basic underlying premise of "there is magic around, but only a few people know about it"... and there is also another rider that is variably emphasised "and science can't deal with it". Which is currently catching me in the mood of pissing me off.

The magic is seen as something special, so come enter this special world that only a few people know about. Become one of a special ones. [Yes, this is can be seen as a metaphor for teens becoming aware of more of the world, but this isn't just teen focused.]

The problem I have is that if it's so pervasive then every day people should be encountering it. I don't care if it is rare, it is still a phenomena happening in the world. And yet, it really feels like "haha! here's this special thing that science doesn't know about, because Up Yours Science, you can't deal with this!"

But no, science is an approach, and any "magic" is as open to that approach of testing and hypothesis as anything else. Nope, magic is special that science doesn't know about, only an exclusive few people do... be one of the exclusive special few!

Now, if you do treat is as pervasive, then yeah, you are dealing with a rather different world state that "our world + secret stuff," but that would be more realistic to how such a world would operate.

And now I'll go a further step in my rant: before it was the case that religion was the dominant way of thinking, with science slowly discovering things. Religion was squeezed into "God of the Gaps", but science closed those gaps. However, people still want something out there that isn't science... and so magic! Science doesn't know about magic! And so, in the desire for supernatural, we have magic and such, taking over the religion-space that science doesn't deal with.

You can say "it's dangerous to interact with magic" and "magic corrupts electronics" (see The Peter Grant series and the Laundry Case Files), but you are still dealing with "magic has a tangible effect," and the scientific approach is still applicable. The Peter Grant series does try to address a scientific approach, but hampered by the small fact that there isn't actual magic so Ben Aaronovitch needs to develop a whole new set up to deal with it.

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Nabu PC

So the Nabu PC is an interesting piece of history. It's from the 1980s US, and while it is a computer, it links directly to cable TV and downloads programs from there. A lot of them were made available recently, and people got interested.

One small problem... while the computer runs, there is no longer any cable network for it to connect to. But does that stop people these days? Heck no! DJ Sures talked with Leo, a technician who worked on the Nabu, and put together code to talk to the Nabu and to link up to a repository of the cable programming. Great stuff!

(He has a lot of other videos about how to hook all this up.)

If you get a Nabu, go to https://nabu.ca/.

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Kai-UP-cycle

Kaicycle is an urban farming, composting and community activation charity in Newtown, Te Whanganui-a-tara Wellington. They are looking to expand their facilities, and are running a Give-A-Little funding campaign. If I recall correct, I supported them when they started, so why not again? Although the deadline is very close. (It looks like they get whatever money is raised.)

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Classic at any scale

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Last of the Men Standing

I recently finished watching the Tim Allen sitcom. By which I mean the second big sitcom of his.

The setup of the show is all about Mike Baxter (played by Allen). He has a family of a wife and three daughters (they start in the range of teenagers, but this show takes place over 9 seasons and even more years!). He is also the man basically in charge of Outdoor Man, a hunting and fishing goods store.

Each episode more or less comes down to "someone has a problem, Mike gets involved, and Mike is right." Sometimes the problem is of Mike's causing, but he's still right even then.

I liked Home Improvement, and this is broadly the same style of comedy, with one big focus change. Mike Baxter is a Republican and hardly an episode goes by where he doesn't espouse an opinion either pro-Rep or anti-Dem. If you can ignore that (and it is really obnoxious), you'll enjoy this more. Interestingly, after 42 gets in, that aspect quietens down a lot (although Allen does like him), which suggests that the writers weren't as happy with a Rep in charge as the character would otherwise profess.

But a big part of this show is that everyone cares about everyone else. Yes, there is arguing, but ultimately everyone has everyone else's back, and that's a great foundation for all the comedy in the show. And that is, essentially, why I kept watching it.

There is also a lot of meta-humour. There are tons of references to Home Improvement, with the actors from there turning up here (including one episode in season 9 where the Tool Man from Binford turns up). Also the series changed network, and an actress changes is also referenced. (In fact there are two cast member changes where Kristen changes from season 1 to season 2, but this isn't addressed, but when Mandy changes from season 6 to 7, yep, that's in there.)

I liked it, but will you? It will depend a lot on how much you can stand Tim Allen, but I was able to enjoy the show while not diving too deeply into the politics of the star behind it.

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Gloss Anian

I saw this! Moreover, I saw this on the big screen! In the brief window before it hits online, I saw this in the cinema with other people. Who laughed a lot. And also whispered, when they could have shut up. Can't have everything.

Benoit Blanc ends up going to a murder mystery weekend, but what is going on with the people who are there is far more interesting than the why they are going. Big egos are involved, and when they get threatened, we see a lot unravel. Often in a rather hilarious way!

I do feel that the comedy in this movie is ramped up more than Knives Out. Not saying that was a stoic piece, but this just feels more like it is going for the japes. There are a lot of "this scene isn't what you think," duping the audience more than anyone else, but I don't mind too much as Rian spins it out. There are some moments at the end where I felt that Rian was handholding a little too much with "remember this bit that I'm bringing up now?" You can trust the audience a little.

Daniel Craig is of course wonderful, and Janelle Monáe gives a fantastic performance. Edward Norton is just having fun, and Katheryn Hahn continues her big "Agatha" energy. Some quite neat cameos too, although I'm thinking I didn't quite get the impact of all of them.

Glad I saw it on the big screen, but looking forward to rewatching on the smaller. Let's see how many easter eggs there are!

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Catching The Bus

Last week was Desert Bus... so it's gone. But you can still watch what happened.

This is all thanks to the Video Strike Team. So named because within minutes of something happening on the bus, they have a clip on the YouTube channel.

But so much happened! If only there was some way to sort the highlights!

There is a spreadsheet listing basically everything that happened during the run, from Coffee Pong to This or That to interviews to just chatting... and there are links to all the video clips. So browse and click through to anything interesting.

And then there's the poster. M Lee Lunsford creates it each year, putting on key highlights. But because this is the internet, this is an interactive poster. See something weird or draws your attention? You can click through to see where that come from!

And if that is still not enough... after about a month, there will be a full torrent of the entire run! Lately in both high and low def, but these are chonky bois these days (as the kids call it). Thicc! But it is everything you can want.

And this is all available for all DB runs, although prior to DB5 it's more hit and miss as to what got archived. But hey, it's more than you have at the moment!

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Watching it forever and forever and...

I saw this the other day, but it's a long ass movie and it got out late, so today I post!

One year after the death of T'Challa (yes, that is a major moment in the film), the Queen and Shuri are finally starting to get over it when Namor turns up. He also has unobtanium, so their two countries should team up against the world. Only, he doesn't really sell that well, and so the two nations instead end up in conflict. Oops!

It's unfortunate that during the whole COVID thing (he says, as if it is no longer a thing) a certain actress became rather (in)famous denier... and she is all up in this movie. Which casts a bit of a pall over things, but aside from that...

Ryan Coogler certainly does his world building. Not only with more Wakandan culture, but also Namor's people. I have no idea how well known his particular (for this movie) backstory is, so I'll stay vague, but we do get a lot of it. And yes, the use of the word "mutant", but I don't think it means what you think it means. I could do with it being a little shorter, but there is a great wee cameo I am definitely not cutting (not that I think anyone would).

My biggest complaint: a lot of scenes take part in the dark of the ocean or in dark caves or at night... which makes it really hard to see what is going on! And I'm definitely going to have to wait for subtitles to get all the lines (and jokes) that were said.

Ultimately: wow, what a way to have a big world spanning war between nations... that has absolutely no impact on the world at all!

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It's "Weird"

So there's an Al Yankovic biopic... or is there?

This covers all the well known parts of Al's life: getting an accordion from a salesman, recording a song in in a bathroom, Madonna asking him to do a parody... but we get those other parts as well. Al going to polka parties, drinking excessively, making real songs that others do covers of. Going to a Mexican criminal's home. You know, the rest of the story. Not to mention the torrid love affair with the aforementioned Ms Ciccone.

Okay, so there might be some liberties taken with the truth, but there's no doubt this is 100% as real as that other music biopic, Walk Hard. Your actual level of humour you will get out of this can vary a lot, but there's no doubt everyone is having fun. And play "spot the celebrity".

While we know Daniel Radcliffe is playing Weird Al, Al himself does the songs. Although we have Evan Rachel Wood as Madonna, we don't get any of her songs, but she definitely looks the part (mainly helped by the 80s hair and the trashy clothes - very on brand for Maddy at the time).

As for where you can watch it outside of having Roku, Mr Weird himself had this to say on twitter:

Roku's working on it. In the meantime there's VPN (Very Probably No) way to watch it legally. I'm sure you have a TORRENT of other questions, but I have to move along, sorry.

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Bar-bar-bar-barberryann

I've heard a few people talk about this horror movie, and I like horror movies, so I like this. Or do I?

A woman arrives at an AirBNB home, but finds someone else has also rented it out. It gets a bit creepy, but then they find the very creepier basement. A man tries to get away from his problems, and ends up at the same house, and finds the creepy basement. Another man sets up the creepy house.

If this sounds a bit disjointed, it really it. It's like three different stories that sort of come together, but it really just feels like three stories that don't cohesively work well together. Fine, I can easily put together details myself, but that's because I've seen this sort of thing so often before, I know what this movie is skipping over... which means this movie isn't actually a good movie in and of itself if I need meta-knowledge to bridge those gaps.

Georgina Campbell gives the best performance, Bill Skarsgard is decent enough, but one big problem... Justin Long. Nope, I just cannot take any horror movie seriously that has Justin Long in it. He has huge stoner energy and that just overwhelms any sense of dread or tension. Just can't buy it.

There are a number of problems with this movie that just don't work, and I thought that during the movie, these aren't 3am fridge thoughts, so... others like this movie, but it's not working for me.

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Maybe Worry A Little, Darling

I watched Stepford Wives in preparation, this is basically an update on that.

Alice is a wife that lives for her husband. Everything he wants, doing mysterious work, don't ask. But then she does start asking, and finds there some weird things going on. Perhaps, just perhaps, what Jack wants is more than what Alice wants.

So the basic premise of Stepford Wives style movie is "men suck, and the only way they can get what they really want is to so control women that they are no longer themselves." And this is definitely in that mold. A "better" update would involve people of all genders being terrible to their partners, but we are still so in the "woman = property" mindset that won't be coming to the theatre to quickly. (There are probably tv series that tackle it, possibly just one episode, but I can't think of any examples.)

Florence Pugh is fine, Harry Styles is... on screen. He means nothing to me. Olivia Wilde should be better, but there has been so much about the making of this movie that her connection to this movie is tainted. Chris Pine cameos and Gemma Chan is the better star in all her scenes.

Before I watched this movie, I watched the Pitch Meeting for it. It was more enjoyable.

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With Pictures

I do have some photos from my cruise. Here is the closest I get to the "Bay of Isles" as they call it.

And the middle of the interior part of the ship had some nice decorations.

Full photos at Cruise Oct 2022.

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Stress Cruise

I had credits to use that were going to expire, so I got myself a wee cruise that went from Auckland (Sunday) to Sydney (Thursday). It did not go well.

Sunday: Flew up to Auckland, had a seat near the front of the plane, but there are delays. Shouldn't be terrible, I have a little time lag allowed for. As we finally land and I dash through the terminal... I see my booked bus leave. Yay! Taxi time, so that's a fun extra charge.

That night on the cruise ship, they already ask "how do you plan to leave (on Thursday?)" The transfer option, which I want, and a booked the flight through the cruise service so I was kinda expecting to give that to me, is only available for flights after mine leaves... So after asking about this at the desk the next morning, I end up with independent leave. I only have a carry on bag, so I should be able to be away by 7am (local time, 9am my time), plenty of time for a taxi. I book with one of the two Sydney cab companies (???) named Silver Cabs.

Tuesday: I find out my departure group. Which is as they call my luggage group, and is at 7.20am. The first transfer group is 7.25. The hell? I could have gone for transfer anyway! After a not great night thinking about this, I talk to the desk. Can't change to a transfer group, and that is indeed the earliest I can get off. As was told to me on a form they had printed out... which means they must have known on Sunday when they asked me if I wanted to leave early!!! I contact the taxi company and change it to 7.30.

Thursday: Finally ready to leave... and time ticks on past 7.20. At 7.45 I get called from Qantas and told that flight is overbooked and I am on Air New Zealand instead, but I am still on the ship. Er, do I know check in closes at 8.20? And the airport is around 30-45 minutes away from the harbour...

7.55am I am finally out and at the taxi stand... and there is no sign of a taxi for me. I grab a Silver Cab taxi (I think it was the other one) and head to the airport... and get there at 8.20am! Fortunately, after dashing to the correct desk, I am able to indeed check in. Barely in time.

Which leaves the security screening. At the scanning station, there are about a dozen queues... the one I am assigned to, I think they bring all the weird trays to from other queues! It takes so long to get through, so much time with bins jumping our ones.

Fortunately, the actual plane is a little late leaving, but get there by the skin of my teeth.

Short version... I should have stayed home.

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Dark Adam!

I didn't really have the energy to see this as soon as it came out. I didn't want to see it... but I did want to want to see it. And then as as last second decision, I decided to go.

In the past a tyrant wanted powers and the peoples rose up against him, but then in current day Apocalypse was risen again... I mean that in the past Teth Adam fought and now he's back. But is he a hero? The Justice Society step in to see what is going on with him, while he in helping the people of Khandak against the forces of Intergang... the most boringly name gang ever. And there is a mcguffin. And very nearly a sky beam!

This isn't a bad movie, but it takes a long time to get going. I saw Age of Apocalypse recently (hence the reference above) and that gets going quicker than this does, and that movie doesn't speed into action. At parts, it's not clear if this is a Black Adam movie or a Justice Society movie, or maybe just a Dr Fate movie... but it is certainly at least one of those at various points.

Dwayne Johnson is... on screen. He should remain in the jungle, he is more fun there. Hey, Aldis Hodge is in this! And I wouldn't say that Pierce Brosnan phoned this in, that would suggest he put more effort into his acting that would be justified. "Hey, we need him to do fighting, but all he wants to do is sit around." "That's okay, his fighting will be all unconvincing CGI."

Overall...it's fine. Nothing that exciting. My highest emotional moment was the relief I felt after going to the bathroom.

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The WORST sitcom?

I had some time yesterday for reasons I will relate later and decided to pick on a podcast to listen to, that relating the tale of The Worst Sitcom Ever Made.

This is the tale of Geoff Houtman, one of the creators of the NZ Sitcom Melody Rule, a kid sitcom from the 1990s... which wasn't meant to be a kid sitcom, nor star the people who were given those roles, and not at all a New Zealand sitcom. The best that's been said about it is "it feels like an American blueprint sitcom set in New Zealand"... which is exactly what it was.

It's a fascinating look behind the curtain of how this was developed, and seen as complete rubbish by most of those involved. But was it really that bad? And can there be any lessons, even from failure?

If you are in NZ, not sure about elsewhere, you can watch the first episode online.

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Clerkies not in 3D

I've seen his other movies, did you think I wouldn't catch this one?

Dante and Randal are still running the convenience store and after Randal has a heart attack decides to make a movie. Which is the first movie, Clerks, complete in black and white, but with all the actors the age they are now. And Dante gets fed up over it.

And that's the movie. Which isn't to say that it isn't funny at times, and a large part of that does come from hearing Kevin Smith talk about various behind the scenes bits which are repeated here, but... yeah, did this movie need to be? This is just a love letter to Kevin's previous movies, and that's great but... unless you know the movies, there isn't much here for the new watchers.

...which doesn't make this a long review, but sometimes that's all it's worth.

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Boodies Boodies Boodies

This is a horror comedy. This is a horror comedy? This? is a horror? comedy? Either I'm really out of touch with what counts as comedy (more than entirely possible) but this isn't comedy. Not much on the horror front either.

So Soph and her new girlfriend arrive for a house party as a hurricane hits and so we get an excuse for people to be trapped inside. After some shenanigans, we get the first death, and then things unravel in spectacular ways.

On the comedy side, this is more drama style, although filtered through heightened emotions brought on by drugs and alcohol. So no-one is really clearly thinking, is the point, and do stupid things. Are they funny things? They say things that you might smirk at, but nothing really tickling the ol' funny bone there.

As for the horror, it's more a low build thriller that remains low and just runs along. Nothing particularly tense or built up, just menace and paranoia, but hardly an explosive setting.

And if we could have less Pete Davidson that would be great. Maria Bakalova and Amandla Stenberg are fine, more of them is fine.

Horror comedy? Drama thriller is where I'm ending up. And even then not that great.

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Raising New Hell

I've watched a lot of Hellraiser, and I like the movies. Well, the first four at least. Later on they just because other movies that the label of Hellraiser got slapped on. This is a... not quite a reboot, this could easily fit into the canon of the movies, largely because there isn't really a canon aside from "there are Cenobites and there is a cube". Still, it does have a few new rules that reboot fits well enough.

Druggie young woman gets a hold of the cube thanks to her boyfriend, and starts solving it (I feel like it's more that the cube guides people in how to solve it more than the people themselves solve it). However, it starts taking victims but she's too caught up in it now. Eventually, she's led to a rich white dude that is behind it all (because aren't they all?), and even winning is losing.

The main attraction here is the Cenobites, but we don't get great looks at their costumes until near the end. I can't swear to it, but they look like practical outfits to me, and in that they look great! The cube has also undergone a few changes, and there are more "configurations" now, and it sure would be fun to get my hands on some of those practical props too (I can only assume pretty much every variation had to be a different practical prop in order to get all that movement out of every step). I do have a prop of the original cube... and yes, it is largely just a block of wood with some gold designs on each side.

Acting-wise, everyone is fine. No-one really stands out, but then no-one sucks either, so it all washes out.

I won't be surprised to see more, and if they stand up to this, we are in good stead for the next phase of the franchise.

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Every HD Body

I'm not sure why now in particular, and if this going to kick off a new trend of doing this, but Madonna (by which I mean more likely whatever company is behind this) released Everybody, now in HD! Both the video and the audio.

Now the audio sounds fine, I haven't seen that particular version back when it wasn't HD so don't know how bad the audio sounded, but the video...

It just doesn't look that crisp, aside from very close up on her face. I don't know what they did, but the general video of her and her background duo wavering around to the music doesn't look very good. This is partly due to the backlights, but everyone looks like they have double image lines around their bodies or something.

HD = "Hey, Dancing!"?

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Alive Dead Brain

Okay, finally got around to seeing this absolute classic of Peter Jackson... Sam Raimi, eat ya heart out!

A man goes to the zoo with his would-be girlfriend and his mother gets bitten by the Sumatra Rat-Monkey. How often has this happened to you? The mother becomes a zombie, lots of other people get infected, how often we have encountered this...

Already, this is better than Bad Taste, both in story and effects. Okay, this time Peter wasn't making up the story as he went along, so that isn't entirely fair to compare them, but we have a far more coherent structure, although it is basically "zombies, and then people, and zombies attack them!". Not exactly a detailed structure of the likes of Christopher Nolan, but it works for me!

And the effects work so much better. I had a longer version (104 mintues) with extra gore, and there are a lot of great practical effects spurting things all over the place and gooey entrails and all sorts of the like. Great stuff!

I can see why so many people recommend this, and I add my voice to that. I now understand "I kick ass for the Lord!"

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A Whole Lot Of Wanting

Hey, that George Miller does more than just Mad Max movies!

A woman finds a djinn, as one does, and so we have a meeting of tales. She is experienced with stories, and when the Djinn tells his she knows there is more to wishes that what people really want. But, and this is the real question, what does she want? And what will she do with it?

Unsurprisingly Tilda Swinton and Idris Elba (especially Idris) really pull this movie together. This is fantastically shot, and they show up fantastically in this! The story is... decent, but nothing really that important. It's stories about stories, and how those stories interact more than the story itself. Which means that this movie really leans more on its cinematography but fortunately that's very well executed. Some shots you would think were by Wes Anderson, yes they were that good!

However, one big complaint... I usually watch with subtitles on. One track was for when they were speaking English, another for when they weren't... hey, how about a track with both??

Still, that George Miller... does good work!

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Quantum Jump

So there's a new Quantum Leap... I am a big fan of the original series, so let's judge this new endeavor entirely on one episode!

Dr Ben Song leaps into the past... and immediately can't remember anything. Fortunately, he has a hologram of his fiancee (not that he knows this) and the rest of his team is scrambling to find out what is going on with him... because he wasn't supposed to be the one who leapt.

So a few things. One this is continuing from the previous series. We get Sam Beckett mentioned straight up (although Scott Bakula has already said he wasn't brought in for this first season) and references to Al as well. This will hopefully stand on its own, but it's already leaning on the past.

Two, the stuff in the past is very generic. Now, they are giving more of a focus on the rest of the team (which took several seasons to really get underway originally) and yay for Ernie Hudson and Mason Alexander Park! But one thing the original series had was deep sincerity for the people he helped in the past, but this isn't feeling that yet. (Again, basing everything on just one episode.)

Thirdly... this does feel like generic network tv, with a budget and overview to match. Let's see how long they take until they start throwing in the curveball episodes and celebrity body of the week... but then this might be more of the personal side.

Which reminds me of the MacGuyver reboot (which did actually reboot). They also went hard on the personal side with lots of team interaction, less puzzle (or old flame) of the week. That's just the way TV is now.

I'll continue to watch (although not post more reviews), but I'm not overwhelmed, or even whelmed, yet.

[END]

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Are we Danger Zone yet?

I've heard really big talk about how good Top Gun 2 is, but I didn't really care overly much, haven't seen the first one for a long time, but yeah, I got around to it.

There's a tough mission to destroy a place belonging to [Enemy Country Here]. Maverick could do this, but he's old, so let's get him in to teach the new kids how to do it, while showing them up by showing off how great he is. Add in a son of a friend, and you've got stakes and a character arc, and off you go!

And... yeah, okay, this is decent. I was surprised by how quickly we got to the main mission by only halfway through the movie and was "hang on, there's a lot of movie left, what's going to happen?" Mainly it just spins things out. Now, this is pretty plane porn, but we aren't getting in deep here, it's very visual.

Which is all to say... this is very watchable, but not exactly memorable.

[END]

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Surprise Winner!

I won a competition! It was for a Whittaker's prize pack, so let's take a look!

Inside is a variety of things. Such as an apron!

An oven mitten and lots of recipes.

And, of course, chocolate!

But the most surprising thing of all... I didn't even know I had entered the competition! Just from buying chocolate at the local store I was entered... which is actually somewhat concerning if you think about it. Huh...

[END]

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Expansive

It took a while, and it was all via audio books, but... I have now heard all of The Expanse. Yes, there was a TV series, and that covers books 1-6, leaving 7-9 as all new. [Fortunately, there is a gap between 6 and 7 so they easily could end up making the later books and cast the same actors.]

Hardly surprising... yes, this is a great series. It's largely hard sci-fi, the main gimme being the "Epstein Drive" that allows travel in the solar system to be days/week rather than years, with communication still at light speed. We get aliens (of a sort), intergalactic travel, and other sci-fi elements, but all grounded and well thought out about the impact this actually has. (Which isn't to say we get physics lessons, but you can definitely believe it's not just a magic wand in disguise.)

This follows a core group of people too. I lost track a little in the tv series, but this works well (it helps to mainline the entire series at once). Unfortunately, not everyone gets through unscathed, but this series isn't gratuitous when it comes to people dying, it is structured well, either because of well understood characterisation, or simply age.

There are also a number of side novellas. Most are just filling in background details, but I can see why one of them was incorporated into the main tv series, it definitely has a long term impact. But you can skip them without any real worry.

And after all this, what's next? Well, it's not like my To Read list is actually any smaller...

[END]

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Calico Cats!

I backed this game a long while ago, and finally got around to playing it.

You are a girl (note: there is extensive customisation features) and you just inherited a cat cafe... and there are others around who are glad that happened, and happen to have a few errands for you to run. And so we get a nice relaxing errand quest game where you can pet all the animals, and there are a lot of them, and open up the map and... the stakes could not be lower.

There is no pressure to get anything done. Just wander around, find animals, bump into people, and just enjoy yourself. (Even the cooking "mini-game" is fun!)

Now, we aren't talking the highest graphics here, and there are some wonky physics, but hey, it's a heckin' fun game to play. And after the last one, this is one I really enjoyed!

I still have to find all the animals if I want, but otherwise, it's time to run a cafe and pet some animals.

[END]

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No more Just Cause 2 play this game

Well, I did the story missions. I found out what the Just Cause was... spoilers for however years old game this is, apparently it was just to nuke an oil field... well, okay then.

Before doing the final missions (and I didn't know it was the final mission until I did the penultimate mission, and which point it then told me I was stuck in the endgame then) I did a ton of collecting, and a ton of faction missions and a ton of other things... and after all that, you get to go back and continue the side mission stuff. That's when I found out I hadn't even done 50%. The hell? Like I know there's a ton of collecting, but the story missions aren't even the bulk of the game! It's all the extra stuff they littered the map with!

So I still have some faction missions to do (although I partially screwed myself with one because I hate flying jets), and then there are lots of places to discover and faction items to pick up... I definitely want to do the faction missions, but beyond that... I might keep the game on my computer in case I feel like diving in and cleaning up the map, but... more likely, I'm just gonna delete the game and move on.

Just Cause 3 at some point, but don't plan on it any time soon.

[END]

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Amazing?? Spider-Man

Way back in the depths of time, I had this game, and played it a lot because hey, I could be Spider-Man! No idea what I played it on, some PC I assume, but I do not recall that opening trailer with the story part. But hey, we are in YouTube times, so here's someone playing it!

I got... about half way when I played it. Couldn't beat Leo's Maze. But even up to that point, you can see the wonderful features of the game: can Spidey stand straight? Can he move on some damn slippery floor? Can he go back and forth over the same bits of puzzle time and again to flip all the damn switches in the right order? Yay, all the fun stuff!

I do recall you could, from the start/first screen, get to the last level, but on the outside of the building. So I could see it, but never get to it. And now, we can all see the entire journey!

[END]

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Still Just Cause 2 Hate Things

More complaining. Why am I still playing the game then? Because I actually like the story and the events, I just don't like some of the actual gameplay elements.

Back to the map, it still sucks. I have learnt some aspects of it, so I can track down pick up items (if I'm close), but that still doesn't help hunting down that last 5% item the base/city/place is wanting you to get to make it 100%. Oh, and there are collectables, 100 for each of the three factions, and only now do I realise the blue marks on the map are indicating them. I say "now" because I have checked them before (the yellow marks are places to visit) but nothing showed up before. Maybe I didn't have the collectibles activated yet? But now there are 300 collectables and so much map to clear up... if I care. If I'm in the area, maybe, but otherwise I doubt I'll go that far (he says before his neurosis kick in).

The vehicles also suck, and they are what you need to get around the place and do races. However, unless you upgrade them, as soon as you hit anything (another vehicle, some bit of geometry) you can be sent flying. And upgrading them isn't that straight forward, some are already upgraded, some aren't. And if you upgrade something and pay to get it delivered... I hope you don't want to hold onto it because you can lose it just as easily.

So is there anything I like? The hacking/hijacking mini game isn't bad, actually. These are QTEs from the numbers 1, 2, 3, and 4. For hijacking, it's a three button sequence. For hacking, it's around 10. Enter the numbers in time, and you are done. If you don't... the hijacking isn't bad, you just pick up where you were, but for the hacking you need to restart. But hey, it's easy enough that it's fun. And I hijack A LOT. A lot of helicopters get sent for me, and they explode me a lot. (Reminder, I am cheating and have infinite health, which is very useful as I can't even tell where the damn thing is before its shot me up.)

All this, and I've sunk over 20 hours into this already. And the story missions are just waiting for me. I've filled up so much of the bars just farting around completing places that I can now just hop from story mission to story mission... but maybe I'll check out that place first, and do that race of there before...

[END]

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Nyarp

It's been out and about the world for a few weeks now, and I've heard some discussion, but not a lot. Would have expected more talk about Peele's latest in the spaces I'm in.

Out on a horse training farm, an accident leaves OJ looking after his pop's work, and doing badly at it. His sister comes to stay, and some odd occurrences suggest there is something strange out and about. And so slowly gathers a group of people to try to capture it on film.

Let's get the obvious out of the way. Yes, it's a slow build. And yes, it's worth the build. I wasn't entirely sure what the through line is, especially with Gordy, but yeah, it's obvious enough. Good performances from the actors, although I found it hard to read some of what Daniel Kaluuya was doing.

As before, Peele gives us a story that is about the black experience and the human experience. Check it out, however while it is visually impressive in parts, I'm not going to insist on seeing it in a cinema.

[END]

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I have Just Cause 2 hate the map

Having playing Far Cry series, I thought I would continue with that feeling by playing the Just Cause games. JC1 was... very much the old graphics of the time. And game play was basically "get to the checkpoint". I played a few hours, but gave it up.

Bringing me to JC2. So far, I need to expand the various fractions so I can get to the guy, which involves going around the map and dealing with the bases. At each point, there are weapon etc upgrade parts to collect, and some times things to destroy, which go toward the completion. Once 100%, the base is done.

However... and this is where I start complaining about the map. For a start: you can't place markers on the map. So if I want to get somewhere, I am constantly bringing up the map to make sure I am on track. And then when I am at the base, for parts if you get close you see a marker, but otherwise... no idea where anything is. No idea even what counts as the area of the base so I don't know how far I need to look. And people don't show up on the map either, so I don't know where people are until I get shot. This is NOT GOOD gameplay.

And so I am playing... but I have a God Mode cheat on. Hey, it's my game, I can play how I want. But me not getting killed while I have no awareness is how I can deal with the deficiencies of needing to wander around trying to find things. Which means I'm going to play this game more, but definitely on my terms.

(And there are other things I don't like, but again, God Mode gives a lot of forgiveness.)

[END]

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Marc Spectator

Since it was a Disney tv series, I grabbed a lot of Moon Knight comics and read them. Okay, skimmed them, but I was wanting to know something specifically, to whit: where did his Dissociative Identity Disorder come from? Ie, when was it made "canon"?

When Moon Knight starts in the 70s, Marc Spector is a mercenary, dies, and is brought back by Khonsu to be the Moon Knight. He takes on the guises of Stephen Grant to control the money and Jake Lockley as a cab driver to get the low down dirt, but they are just other guises. Like how Batman has Bruce Wayne and Matches Malone. Marlene refers to him as "schizophrenic", but mainly because he gets into each part rather than they really are other personalities.

This goes on over a few different volumes. Depending on the writer, he could just be Marc Spector, or sometimes the other guises come up, especially as one "dies". Any hints of DID is peripheral at best, but again as if he is getting really into those parts rather than they are other identities in his head.

And then we get to Bendis in the 2010s and suddenly, yep, he has full on DID with other personalities being Spider-Man, Wolverine and Captain America (don't ask, Bendis gonna Bendis). But from that point on, he is just assumed to have always had DID, with later series getting even more into that space.

So no real moment, just a slow canonisation of that aspect of the character.

[END]

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Bluebridge / Interislander

I popped down to Picton this week because... it was there! So why not? Although pro-tip: if you go to Picton, get there before 9pm because everything will be shut then. To get there, I took the BlueBridge Ferry down and the InterIslander Ferry back. So let's compare!

First off, BlueBridge. I got a cabin, which was quite useful. Now, through no control of their own, the weather was terrible, and we got away late. Like, by the time we left we should have arrived in Picton. This also meant that the trip over the Strait was... not great. And so a cabin was really great, in that I could lie down in the dark and, most importantly, had a toilet in my cabin, which had a very useful feature: proximity. I also didn't try any of the food, but it looked fine? And certainly other people were getting it.

The InterIslander. They don't have a cabin on their regular cruises, but they do have the Plus Lounge, which is adult only. I went for that. You do get a larger chair to sit in, and they bring around food for you, quite often. Fortunately, the weather was nicer, so I was happy to eat, and the travel was a lot easier.

Comparing the two, if I had gotten something to eat on BlueBridge, then the price would be about the same. If you want privacy, a cabin is good. If you are more likely to eat, go for the InterIslander.

That said... my actual recommendation is take a plane. SoundsAir flies there, and takes around 30 minutes compared to the over three hour ferry journey. Yes, the price is also about the same, but the time saving more than makes up for it (although you do need a shuttle at the Picton end to get to the actual town).

[END]

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Them/They

This is a new horror Blumhouse movie set at a gay (de)conversion camp... you know what, you don't need the horror in this for this to be a horror movie!

A group of kids go (are sent) to this camp, and the educators there are... terrible people really. Just treating these kids in the way of these camps is bad enough, we don't need a slasher. (And I found it amusing that considering these kids are mostly gay, splitting them into a boys cabin and girls cabin seems a bit antithetical. Oh, and they need a gender neutral cabin now, but I'm sure camps will go as hard as possible to never do that.) But eventually, we do get a slasher, and that's a thing that happens here.

The slasher aspect is rather unexciting. Bad people get slashed, and the movie sets them up to not be liked, so that's fine, but it happens to incidentally to the movie you could easily think the movie thinks this is lesser plot as well as I did. (And the proper way to pronounce this movie is "They Slash Them", so just explaining how that ties in.)

It's a decent picture, but they could have done something better than throw this trapping onto it.

[END]

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Bulleto Trainu

It's fun! Go watch it!

Okay, you want a bit more? A snatch and grab guy goes onto a train to get a briefcase and get off... only there are many other people also there with their own plans that intersect and often frustrate each others plans. This is based on a book, and I wonder how much of the wackiness was in the original novel and how much was added for the movie.

There are a lot of names here, not only Brad Pitt, but also Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Hiroyuki Sanada, Andrew Koji and recent the recently seen Joey King (from The Princess). And some other cameos I won't reveal but I often went "hey, I know that person!" although one took me a long time to place. While I don't generally say "avoid spoilers" before going in, I will offer my anecdote that being surprised by who turned up was very pleasant and I'm glad I didn't know to look out for them.

This is definitely on the comedy end of the action spectrum. Definitely recommend checking it out!

[END]

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Liteyeah

They finally did it. A Lightyear movie. It was inevitable, with only two things being different now: Tim Allen isn't doing the voice (although why not the older Buzz?), and it doesn't actually match what they already established.

Buzz crashes a ship on a hostile planet, and so begins his quest to find a way off while people live lives around him. Which is an easy way of him being involved in the set up, then jumping so that he can see in the next generation of recruits, the sort of thing that would be a second movie. But there's a lot of story in this movie, and I felt like we were approaching the end when we were only about a third through it!

Ultimately, it's a fine movie. It's the standard "solo person needs to learn to work with a team" that works without doing anything challenging. Really feels like Pixar was running on automatic for this one.

But yes... I do want a Sox toy, so that worked.

[END]

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Nite Kwart

So I've been (re)watching Night Court... I didn't know it was nine seasons long! That's a lot of episodes!

Judge Harry Stone runs the Night Court, in which cases come in front of him during the night shift with Defender Christine Sullivan and Prosecutor Dan Fielding giving the defense and prosecution. Mac handles the paper work (and wears sweaters) and Bull Shannon stands large, and Roz with him. And there is a lot of comedy.

First off, are night courts an actual thing? I could look it up, but where's the fun in that?

This show changed a lot over the first few seasons. The first two had different Defenders entirely from season to season (heck from pilot to season) before Christine became the defender (although she did cameo in an early episode in a previous season, clearly the producers liked her and brought her back). Also the guard with Bull was an elderly lady, whose actress passed away, to be replaced by another elderly lady, whose actress also passed away, before ending up with Roz. Very much the same idea of the cynical "seen it all" voice across all characters, but clearly the producers were a bit shy of another incident.

The bulk of the seasons were very much the same. It wasn't until very late that actual constant changes happened, with Christine getting married and having a child being the main one, and Dan's lacky passing away with that plot line going through things. Then we get the end of season nine (the last season) with a two parter that basically sets off characters in a new direction (I presume they knew it was the last season, so dealt with them). Then we get the actual final episode, which I assume was a special instance of some kind, as it was otherwise a generic episode that could have been in any previous season.

And then it was all over. In all, some good television. Some obvious episodes dealing with issues (some not well, hello 80s), but overall I'm glad I indulged again. I can't immediately think of another series that did the mix of law and comedy like this.

[END]

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Blak Phon

From the concept, I thought the person was kidnapping like 10 year olds. Nope, these are teenagers, so we get kids who can actually act.

The idea is the lead gets kidnapped, but it takes a while to get there. Once we do, we get him connecting to the previous victims and they help him to escape...

And this worked a lot better than I thought it would. Partly because the kids are older, but also because the script doesn't hang around too long with wasted side plots but just gets on with it. Yes, Ethan Hawke is in this, but we spend more time with Mason Thames and he does a good job as Finney.

So with this movie scoring higher for me and a movie that, while it starts slow, does get there, it's one to check out.

[END]

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It Just Raises Too Many Questions

I've been listening to Ed and Lorraine Warren books and... I have questions.

Ghosts

They say that ghosts come about because people's lives are cut short for one reason or another. While not everyone who dies early will become a ghost, we would expect the same chance of becoming a ghost across all situations, which means... We are about to hit 8 billion people, and some percentage should be ghosts... so there should be more ghosts than ever before? Where are they then?

Demons

If you do bad things, you get demons. Try a ouija board? Demons. Acknowledge Satan? Demons. Do any kind of bad thing? Demons. But it's not just what you do. If you are somewhere where someone else did bad things, then you might still get Demons. So again... they should be everywhere? Unless there's only like five demons in total for everywhere? Or does so many people being atheists mean the demons get to hide? But then highly religious places should be acknowledging demons all over the place.

Religion

But that that relies on culture acknowledging demons. Which, according to the Warrens, can only be fought by calling on Jesus Christ. So... a Shinto Priest would have no effect? Asking Mohammad to intervene does nothing? Pleading to Shiva is entirely useless? Phew, just fortunately we got at least some of it right to hit on the right religion 2000 years ago.

Evidence

The Warrens say they have plenty of tape, both audio and video. Let's see it then. Lots of things flying around, okay, show us. Lorraine got the highest ESP score at Berkeley, oh yeah, where's that then? Ed says you can photograph tombstones and ivy grows on there in the form of the buried people's faces, sounds great let's do a double blind test around that then!

Technology

With all our phones and such around, we should have more video than ever. Although with how easy it is to manipulate video, I will acknowledge that this is tricky. But still, should still have tons of video.

One person they cite is William James: "Why do so few 'scientists' even look at the evidence for telepathy, so called? Because they think, as a leading biologist, now dead, once said to me, that even if such a thing were true, scientists ought to band together to keep it suppressed and concealed. It would undo the uniformity of Nature and all sorts of other things without which scientists cannot carry on their pursuits." ... Who is this leading biologist who said that? Who would even say that?? We want evidence, give it to us!!!

Yeah, some questions.

[END]

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Captain Scarlet - wah wah waaah waaah

And not about that silly animated series!

[END]

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Love and... Thunderstruck!

Hey. new Marvel, so new Marvel review!

First off, a lot has been made of this "just" being two hours, and yet... that works. It's amazing these days that you can tell a superhero movie in under ten years, but this gets a lot done in that two hours. Okay, some things are summarised or tokenised into one example scene, but mostly those are background details to get to the actual story being told.

Which is... pretty good. Thor goes on a journey to confront aspects of his past, but that could be any movie. The focus here is, of course, Jane Foster and it's great to see Natalie Portman back with something decent to do, so sure, more of that. That said, it would have been nice for Tessa Thompson to have more to do as well. I didn't even recognise Christian Bale beneath that makeup, but there's no mistaking Russell Crowe eating all the scenery.

One critique, Taika lays on the humour a little too much at times. Sure, the fun is funny but can adversely undercut some moments.

I'm sure y'all gonna go see this, but one final point of note: the running time seems to be either 119 minutes (google) or 126 minutes (imdb). As far as I can tell, mine was 119 (including credits), but maybe there might be different cuts around.

[END]

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Horseplay!

Behold the power of three people who don't have anything to do, do absolutely nothing! We wander around, sort of do something, and nothing comes of it. Although I do quite like what happens in hour two, that's something innovative that occurred to me, and it worked! Wow!

And as for my question at the end "what have we done in the meantime?" ... NOTHING! This is the third to last adventure of the season, and as yet, three years later, no more seasons have happened. Logan lost interest and that is always a sign of nothing is going to happen and if something does it'll be a brand new universe of stuff. So that might happen some decade...

It's one of those titles that just comes up without effort. It just had to be.

[END]

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Foul Sense

If you talk about movies and are a New Zealander, sooner or later you talk about Peter Jackson, and refer to his earlier works. Now, I have seen Meet the Feebles, but not his earlier pieces... until now, I have seen the first one shot over four years... and it shows.

Cannibal aliens have come to New Zealand (as they do) and it's up the Boys to put paid to them. Which involves a lot of guns, brains, and splatter.

And it starts off in Maraka Bay! Don't tell me that's not where they are, I was just there a few weekends ago... it hasn't changed much. But then they head to the hills and there are certainly plenty of them around, but I can't say I recognised any particular other locations.

This has a high splatter and gore... but I have to say I expected more. Maybe when I watch the next one. But hey, cheap budget! And as for the script... no, there wasn't one. And yeah, I can tell. Lots of random scenes that feature running around. But again, first feature. And then there is the bad audio overdubbing. Ah, the earliness of it all!

Maybe I've had this overhyped but I can't say I was that overtaken by this. Even taking the age into account. It's... fine.

[END]

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Sprig-Can!

I remember the Spriggan movie. I liked it, really good. This was way back in the day when you actually had a good chance of keeping on top of Americanised Japanese Anime Movies. There weren't many, so it was good.

I picked up the Spriggan manga, because I wanted to enjoy more. There were 6 stories in 3 volumes, with lots of different stories, but all about Spriggan trying to do something good while beating up back guys (at least, presented as bad guys). Decent manga.

And so when I heard that Spriggan was on Netflix... I just figured it was the movie finally come to Netflix. Yeah, I might get around to watching that. And then I pressed Go...

And it's the full season of anime of all the stories of Spriggan! As far as I can tell/faintly remember, this is all the six stories as what was in the manga, in 45 minute chunks (so the 90 minute movie is compressed into half the time, no bad thing really).

Go, enjoy... and let's see if they can squeeze out another season and I can return to this world again.

[END]

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Dam Dog

Hey, want a surreal movie around 30 years in the making?

We open with an excerpt from Leviticus, about god making a city a ruin... is this that city? We have an assassin going down into a place of cheap death and short nasty lifes, and attempting to do something about it. But not a lot. And he's not the only one as we see some other attempts, but the baby inside him is useful for creating monoliths and...

No, I have no idea what's going on. At least, in a metaphorical sense. I can see what's happening on screen, with various creatures moving about, but what it ultimately means, I can't really say.

This is a stop motion movie from Phil Tippert that was started a long time ago, put on hold, then brought back and successfully Kickstartered (and yes, there are Kickstarter backers). This took a long time, but... it's still very cohesive in style and story (such as one can follow it).

It's on Shudder, so you could also check out other horror movies, but yes, note that this movie does go into the gross and gory often and hard.

[END]

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Operation Mincedmeet

I was expecting a hilarious Weekend at Bernie's style romp with using a corpse to fool Hitler, not this.

The Allied Forces need to take Sicily, so the Germans had to be distracted. One option was Operation Trojan Horse, to use a dead body washed up to leak faked papers to make the Germans believe the attack was on Greece instead. This is the story of that body and the operation behind it.

Which has a bit more romance and intrigue that you might normally expect, and not just on the side of trying to fool the Germans (indeed, that part is nearly rushed through). The personal story gives the movie more personal stakes, but either the movie gets limited by what actually happens or you go on entire flights of fancy that just end up taking over everything. I suspect they err more on the former than the latter.

And quite the cast to carry it all off. Colin Firth. Matthew Macfayden. Penelope Wilton. And a rather surprising performance from Mark Gatiss, in that I was surprised to see him in a non Doctor Who / non Steven Moffat production.

Decent movie, which can easily be seen on Netflix... if possibly not New Zealand's Netflix...

[END]

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They're Bad Guys, but are they bad guys?

The latest animated feature, with an art style that seems to weirdly mix 2D and 3D,

They are the bad guys of the animal world, wolf, shark, snake, etc. But are they all bad? Can they be good? And what if they really were?

There are a lot of familiar elements here and nothing will really surprise you, but I will give that the elements are mixed together in a way I can't immediately placed as copying elsewhere, so there is that.

Sam Rockwell has the lead voice, and kinda disappointing that we don't get him dancing. There are other good vocal performances too, so much so that it doesn't feel like DreamWorks hired them because of their name, but actually because they can vocally act.

Not terrible, but I doubt anyone will remember this in a month or so.

[END]

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Dominionionion

I can barely remember any of the previous movies, so that's the best state to go into this one which wraps them all up!

There are dinosaurs all over the world, and Biosyn volunteers to gather them all up. And yet, for some reason, EVERYONE is shocked by the fact that they turn out to be evil. The cast of the first three movies get involved to find evidence, the cast of the second lot of movies get involved to get the girl back, and when they meet... that is a moment in the movie.

I'll be honest... this was just a bunch of scenes that happened on screen. Especially when there are action sequences involving Claire and Owen. You know how great scenes have people moving about and the camera establishes the geography so you know where everyone is in relation to everywhere else, and where they are going etc... I had no idea at all how one bit connected with the others. I assume people got from one place to another in a way that made sense, but... I am just assuming that.

It is good to see Sam Neill and Laura Dern again, and the others are decent too.

But I just wasn't that into it. It didn't help that people were constantly popping out and in of the theatre, so possibly others were also not into it (let alone a few people left partway through and I never saw them again). So, only really see this if you are really invested in what's going on.

[END]

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Rememory

This is not a family feel good movie. Shocking, considering this features Liam Neeson.

Liam is playing an assassin, but he doesn't want to do his job. And so becomes a target. Which sounds fairly generic, and that is, but there is another aspect in that that is just one of the plots, the other is a group of three FBI peoples who end up after the same people that want Liam dead. And this all involves child sex-trafficking, so yeah, not actually fun.

Decent enough. There's the gimmick that Liam is having the Alzheimer's, but this just leads to a small side point that doesn't really matter. (This really comes about because this movie is based on De zaak Alzheimer, or The Memory of a Killer.)

Guy Pierce is the other main lead here and.. he is quite good. I can't recall all his other roles, but right now I'm thinking I like most of his roles... We also got not much more than a cameo from Monica Belluci, but also decent performances from Taj Atwal and Harold Torres.

Not going to blow you away with how wonderful this is, but a solid enough film.

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Decrets of Sumblesore

I've finally bothered to watch the latest movie and... I can't say that I hated it.

There is definitely some problems with it. From the hamfisted attempt at a political story to some rather pointless plots about brothers being captured, but... It was fine. There's some stuff that doesn't work well, but that isn't to say this is actively bad.

Although I will question the entire point of Clarence.

But the performances are all right. The effects are fine. While I don't think you need some of the story points, I could follow what was going on (which is more than many people could say for the second movie).

Overall it's a Meh. But the Wizarding World was never something I was actively involved in. And certainly I won't be bothered if there are no more movies (which I know is a preferred treatment, or at least take it away from that problematic author). The movie in and of itself is fine.

The circumstances around some of the actors and the producer are the real problems.

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La panthère des neiges

Despite the original name, this is called The Velvet Queen, which is not a translation of the title. This movie was put on with the Wellington Zoo as they are building a new Snow Leopard enclosure.

This movie is about a couple of French men who go hunting in the mountains of Tibet. Where "hunting" means with cameras and binoculars. While they do see many animals, don't go expecting a lot of snow leopard footage. But do except long monologues about the silence...

Yes, I do acknowledge that there is some irony in a documentary about going and see animals in the wild which is fundraising for keeping animals in captivity. But I'm not going to get into the politics of zoos, but I will say... I love leopards, and if the snow leopards have a Close Encounter opportunity, I will be there!

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Man Sandwich!

This was a big mod that Logan made and ran a lot of people on. The Blue Mage was a bad guy in this game that we completely didn't interact with at all. So Logan took the step for us to do something about it. A lot of people ran on it... and had no idea what was going on for a lot of it.

Whereas, twenty minutes into the second episode, I grok what is going on. It helped that Legends of Tomorrow did an arc with them, so I completely dialed in on what the essence was. It also helped that I was in "don't care about the decoration, just get on with it" mode which made me ignore a lot of rubbish that others got caught up with. (And us three missed a lot of references.)

Fortunately although we were quick, we were the last group (Logan says we were the quickest group, but I think Matt's group was also quick, they just did stuff afterwards to pad the time out). If they had all been this quick he probably would have had to change it.

Normally these games are five parts, but we were quick and had no abilities to go other stuff, so three episodes it is.

The title is obvious once you listen to the first part. It was just one of those silly moments that you go with 'cos why the hell not?

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RrrrRrrrR

Oh hell yes! You want big epic movie? This is it. Outrageous events that just does for it? This is it. A great example of Indian movies? This. Is. It.

But I'm not going to be able to do this justice. All I can say is that this is on Netflix (although it is the Hindi version, but with subtitles it's not like most of us English speakers are going to be able to tell the difference).

Instead, I'll hand it over to Patrick Willems:

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Duale

So, I'm guessing the point of this movie is "you are your own worse enemy"?

The basics of the movie is simple enough: girl becomes sick, girl gets clone, girl stops being sick, girl and clone have to fight to the death to earn the right to be the one left alive. Classic story.

The girl in this case is played by Karen Gillan, and when it comes to the eventual combat section, you know she already has a leg up on action poses. She and herself are easily differentiated as she gives the two characters different mannerisms and (more obviously) different hairstyles.

The other characters are largely just bit players in her story, although Aaron Paul gets some decent screen time. The production is mostly decent, with only a few times Karen didn't quite eyeline herself.

As to the essence of the story, there are a few considerations: own enemy as mentioned above, which aspect of yourself would survive, can you face yourself, etc...

But what confused me was not the ending itself (and what happened was obvious), but... were we supposed to be surprised by that? Because it was obvious, so what is revealed is just what we know. I'm not sure I get it beyond that. (And what happened to the car? Was there a deleted scene there?)

Watchable? Sure, but I was kinda hoping for something a little more nuanced.

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In Den Uffizien

Oooh, a film festival with documentaries? Don't mind if I do! Although I only saw one: Inside the Uffizi.

The Uffizi is a museum in Florence, and we go behind the scenes as they deal with some supporters coming to them, and setting up some new pieces. It's one of those "just watch people do things" documentary, with a very minor talking head interview with the librarian to give us some basics about the Uffizi.

This is as much about people who visit the museum as it is about the pieces and the people working there. There's a great moment where they have one person talk about a piece, Medusa, and then we see many people take a photo of it and move on... which is a little undercut later with someone saying that people do that... yeah, we got that. There is something in the "show and don't tell" presentation.

Anyway, an interesting enough look at what's going on in a rather famous museum.

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Dale 'N' Chip

Big fan of Chip and Dale here... but I never really watched Rescue Rangers. For a long time, didn't even realise this was a thing. Had CnD comics, not really a tv series. So we have this sequel to a lot of things.

Two friends drifted apart, but come together again. Which is really reductive, but the basic story is and, to be honest, doesn't really matter. What matters is...

This is Chip and Dale again! Woo! Love those little critters, so we see them in a full movie! Which makes a LOT of fourth wall jokes. Like deliberately and intentionally. We are full Roger Rabbit (and the movie doesn't even try to be subtle about this) with Chip and Dale being actors, but of course we have to have them becoming the Rescue Rangers...

But does this movie actually like them as such? While there is a lot of references to the series, and it is seen through rose-tinted glasses, but it is seen as a time long ago and they have moved on. There is a lot of tat that is considered rubbish, and it's a nostalgia property that is just a nostalgia property and isn't needed now. Dale has moved on to become 3D. Chip moved on and has his own (crappy) life. Gadget and Zipper moved on. Everyone moved on. Ellie is surprised by the junk Dale has. And... when they finally put the costumes on, it's treated entirely as a joke and not something that people want to see.

That all said, this is fun. There are lot of jokes and such, and many moments to make you go "hey, I know that thing!"... Which is gonna pin this to being tied to a moment in time. Ten years from now, no-one is going to remember anything here.

So enjoy this movie, but do so now. The TV series is a timeless adventure. Chip and Dale are iconic cartoon creatures. This movie is a product of now.

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The Norfm'n

I've heard that people like this, but I was still unsure going into it.

Amleth is a prince among... his people. However, his Evil Uncle(tm) decides to do a bit of regicide and he runs away... to become a buff Alexander Skarsgard. From there, he comes back to get his vengeance and kill a lot of people. And hook up with a maiden fair. So, you know, #SquadGoals...

This is.. epic. In the sense that it is certainly telling a full on tale with sweeping vistas and a very enthralling tale. I'm not saying this was novel, but I definitely was interested in what was happening next, and that's the proper essence of a well told story.

There are some great visuals here. Lots of full on camera work to show scenes off. There can be an extremely limited colour palette at times, which makes the odd splash of colour quite disconcerting, but it soon settles in fine (until it does it again).

As good as this is, it's certainly long enough but doesn't yet outstay its welcome.

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Bore-bius

Okay, there was a small problem in that I knew the plot going in (eg see below), but even so...

Two boys grow up together. One becomes a super hero (in so far as any character played by Jared Leto could ever be considered not evil), and can you guess what the other boy does? Like, just go for the most obvious guess. That's what the movie does.

Really, in about any sense, the movie goes for the most boring choice at every opportunity. And yes, the train flying sequence is about as stupid as you could gather. (They could have done an interesting moment with the ship to reflect the OG vampire, with the ship just turning up with everyone dead and confusion about what happened, but nah, not when it's really about "you hurt my (not) girlfriend, you will pay for that!".)

Aside from Jared Leto, we need to talk about Matt Smith. What is the Doctor doing here? Not a lot to be honest. Matt Smith just plays the easy choices for his character, but then I can't complain he should put in more effort than the movie deserved.

And then shoe-horning in that mid-credit scene... sigh. Really, just watch this video instead:

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Losted City

Been a long time since I Romanced the Stone, but that's the obvious comparison here. But there's another big factor in play here.

A romance novelist just so happens to be a lapsed archeologist, and because her occupations overlapped, she gets kidnapped to find a lost tomb. But her cover model has delusions of grandeur, so immediately makes any rescue that much worse because he has to get involved. Nevermind, he respects and wants her admiration, so all is eventually forgiven and the good guys survive the day.

Sandra Bullock is the key in play here. She knows she is in a romantic comedy and just decides to go whole ham, giving me similar energy to her sting in Miss Congeniality. She knows this is ridiculous, so just goes full on into it. When she comedys, she Comedys.

Channing Tatum tries to be the romantic lead, but even as a comedy foil he doesn't really pull it off. Brad Pitt, understandably, completely overshadows him, and I think all of us would have preferred more Brad in the movie.

Daniel Radcliffe, on the other hand, should have been the same or related to his character in Now You See Me 2, because he's basically playing the same person.

On the whole, come for the pretty scenery, and stay for the pretty scenery. It is very pretty scenery.

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Ssoonniicc

Ye gods. Cut about an hour from this movie, and it might just be bearable.

The end credits recap this movie, with recreating scenes of Sonic sighting Knuckles and Robotnic, Tails coming in to help, them all battling over the gemerald... and that part of the movie is fine (enough). But the actual movie has so much more, with a completely irrelevant wedding scene and a dance sequence that could also be skipped over. Frankly, cut it down to the movie the end credits suggest and you might get something worthwhile.

Jim Carrey is definitely the main feature of this movie. Not only does he ham it up, he also porks and bacons. Even beefs, apples, eggs and does not so much chew scenery as make complete meals out of every scene he is in. Which is about the only enjoyable parts of the film.

However, he does seem to be the only one having fun. The rest of the actors are... also in this movie, and trying to interact with CGI creations. The CGI creations themselves are... fine. Idris Elba is clearly far too sophisticated for this movie and that comes across as well.

Frankly, the whole thing should be avoided. Instead, just watch this:

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Dr MOM

First off, a warning. My local usually had 15 minute ads before the screening. However, I got in (after a huge queue for reasons) just before that 15 minute mark, and the movie was already screening. Yeah, they started "early".

Second point, there is a lot of moments that can be spoiled here. So I don't even want to say anything, other than there was a lot of audience reaction (in the No Way Home sense). There will be millions of "easter egg" and "explainer" videos coming out of this.

And yet... while there is a heck of a scope (we are talking the multiverse here), the story is quite small and focused. Stakes are set up and the movie is about what can be done about those stakes. There's not a lot of extra story beats all over the place. Given this movie is a "short" 2 hours, that works well, but it does mean we only get that one story, not much else.

With all this, this movie has some great moments, but also is just another chapter in the life of the MCU. It'll get rave reviews, then things will settle down and we'll get a proper appraisal as it works in the wider scope.

But the more immediate question is: do I go back and see it again soon so I can see how it actually starts?

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Unchartirus

I've seen other Let's Plays of the videogames, so I had some idea before seeing the movie.

Nathan Drake is a wee baby who joined up with Sully to go on a treasure hunt. The fetus gets involved in several slapstick moments, culminating with the gleam in the milkman's eye sailing around on a boat.

I keep going on about the youngness of the lead because the movie sure as hell bangs the drum enough about it in order to pretend that Marky Mark is old enough to be Sully. But yeah, the treasure hunt nature of the movie reminds me of a lot of other similar movies, but then the video game was also just another take on action/puzzle games. (Hey, Tomb Raider but with... get this right... a while male protagonist!! What a twist!!!)

Which isn't to say it isn't enjoyable, just that to me it didn't really hit any new heights. The characters all proclaim themselves as selfish, so I have no investment in them as characters, so don't really care when they get betrayed as they are quick to do that themselves. And the action set pieces feel like action set pieces that could have been swapped in from and other similar movie. (I keep wanted to say "National Treasure".)

The best thing I will give it is that it doesn't try to overly pad out the movie, and is a decent two hours and done.

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ambu-WAH-nce

Maximum Bayhem!

The basic pitch is "bank robbery goes wrong and the robbers get away in an ambulance"... and that's the longer story too. In fact, you'll be impressed by how far they can stretch a premise of "not being able to stop an ambulance" and making it a lot worse.

Which brings up a question I have to ask, and this has been asked before explicitly in movies, but not here, for example in Saving Private Ryan. While you can't really (emotionally) express this in numbers: how many people have to die in order to save one person?

There's a cop in the back of the ambulance, which is the main reason they just don't ram it off the road. But there are many, many crashes and damn skippy the officers inside those cars are not making it out (there's one moment where a car is sliced in half by a ramp off the back of a truck). Except we don't see any of them, so... does that make it right? Is "unless we see them dead they are fine" logic in play here? Because, and I do acknowledge it's not an easy call, many people do seem to be dead here. Which the movie doesn't address at all. (So I guess "and they all lived happily ever after being cut in two" does hold...)

It wouldn't be an excessive problem, but the damn chase goes on so long that you have time to sit and wonder about these things. Yes, this is a Bay movie, and you can tell he got some drone cameras and decided to use them all over the place, but after a while explosions and swooping cameras just become background noise.

It's fine and basic entertainment, but clearly it wasn't quite enough to stop me from pondering the big questions.

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Leg End of the Sea Devils

You know what have tipped this episode over the top? The Myrka! We need the Myrka dammit!

This is supposed to be a special, and yet it was the same length as any normal episode. And what's more, it was just like any normal episode too. Could easily have been a filler story in any season. I know it was supposed to be the end and the BBC asked for another episode to fill it out, but is that the whole reason this became such a nothing-burger?

It is great to see the Sea Devils back, and a really fantastic creature costume too. Slight movement on the mouth as talking to keep up the alienness of it, and an easy movement as well. Good job whatever department made that!

And as for the other characters... did someone roll the dice and decide "Let's go Chinese theme", and that was as far as they went? Other than Chinese names, this could have been any random collection of people. Did the covid mean this is why there is hardly any cast? We really could have done with actual people with actual impact on the plot.

But speaking of editing, this felt really shoddy. Like they didn't film some scenes, so just cut those bits from the episode, regardless of how it affected the flow of the story. At best, we might get a random shot of something with an audio clip of the Doctor going "Geronimo!' (flashing back some regenerations there, Doc?), but mostly it just felt like someone blinked and we missed it.

Thasmin had some continuation, but... again this is just a filler episode moment.

One big moment left for the Thirteenth Doctor... hope it's more of a bang than this!

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