Thursday 15 March 2012

DW: Monstrous Missions

Another day, another 'get money from people' product by BBC. Case in point: Monstrous Missions. Not that the stories are bad, just that the motivation from the BBC is more 'money' than 'we want to tell these DW stories'.

Anyway, first up is Jonathon Green's tale of Terrible Lizards. In which we reference Vincent and the Doctor, Hungry Earth, The Vampires of Venice, The Time of Angels, The Curse of the Black Spot, and end on ripping off (and namechecking) On Stranger Tides. [Until I checked, I thought this was written by Gary Russell!] But then it settles down into a search for the Fountain of Youth with dinosaurs (yes, with an Invasion of the Dinosaurs reference). Which is wrapped up with several chapters to go, so some extra fake tension is added to pad out the ending. It, basically, isn't very good.

Then is Gary Russell's Horror of the Space Snakes. Aka 'Snakes on a (moon) base!' To credit Russell with more, it isn't just 'snakes on a base' (which the characters say a few times), but an actual story that I think would work well on TV, with bearable child characters! The plot is straight forward, lots of build up to the full interaction of the snakes, then it quickly gets to a resolution without really maintaining a real sense of tension as there are no dead bodies or anything. Notably, while Terrible Lizards has Amy and Rory, this is a companion-less story (with kids standing in for them).

Not great stories this time. 1/2 mark for Terrible Lizards due to not actually having its own story, but ripping on others. 1/2 mark to Horror of the Space Snakes for no actual Horror. Given this 2-in-1 a 1-in-2.

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